Everything in this paper needs to be explained more clearly. It has a lot of jargon, and you include a lot of details that are not explained and are not really relevant. It sounds like you might have tried to paraphrase an article, rather than trying to understand the ideas yourself and then write them out as you understand them–this just makes the paper much less clearer than it could be if you simply tried to explain the ideas yourself.
Do not use quotes and explain everything clearly as it is like you. No paraphrasing and not quotes. Do not use quotes and explain everything clearly as it is like you. No paraphrasing and not quotes.